Agent and Lies role play extravaganza!
by agent-to-the-rescue
Summary: That's right people, I'm back with another awesomely random roleplay with my friend white.black.truth.lies Blowing stuff up and eating ice-cream has never been so fun! FMA, Black cat, Death note, and Bleach characters included.
1. Round 1

_**A/N: This is a role play written by both White Black Truth Lies and I. It was just something random that we conjured up. **_

AN: Hi. My name is Lies. I'm a werewolf. And I'm very distracted. And I'm not giving Agent anything to type so she is typing for me while I slack off. There's a dinosaur behind you! Oh no! Or was it an octopus? No I'm pretty sure it's a dinosaur. Back to you Agent with the disclaimer!

_**Disclaimer: We own nothing but ourselves! *Ghost noises***_

* * *

Key: Lies - normal

_**Agent - bold italic**_

Lies: boing, boing, boing, boing... owww!

Agent: What happened?

Lies: I jumped into a wall!

Agent: *snort*

Lies: It's not funny!

Agent: ...

Lies: It's not!

Agent: ...

Lies: It's not!

Agent: Sure it's not...

Lies: *sighs* you're mean.

Agent: *grin* you're just finding that out?

Lies: *splutters in indignation*

Agent: Idiot.

_**Lies: So what are we going to talk about?**_

_**Agent: Well, since I'm high, I thought we could *drum roll* ROLEPLAY!**_

_**Lies: *Cheers***_

_**Agent: Wow, I really can't spell. Anyway, mental blank.**_

_**Lies: *face palms***_

_**Agent: Lol, face palm. *giggles insanely.***_

Lies: Do you want a sandwich?

Agent: sure!

Lies: What kind? I have honey, or chicken, or bear, or honey...

Agent: Wait, what!

Lies: What, what?

Agent: What was that last one?

Lies: Honey?

Agent: No! The one before that!

Lies: Bear?

Agent: Yes!

Lies: What about it?

Agent: *stares blankly* Do you really not see what is weird about that kind of sandwich?

Lies: Uhhh...

Agent: Just as dimwitted as usual...

Lies: That's me! Dim,idiotic, clumsy Lies!

Agent: Don't admit to it dummy!

Lies: Who are you calling dummy!

_**Agent: -sigh- Nevermind. So... do you think we should invite a few anime characters into this rolplay. Cause, at the moment it's just us typing a whole bunch of crap. Lol.**_

_**Lies: True. Add away.**_

_**Agent: *Devious grin* All right! I choose... Ichigo Kurosaki!**_

_**Lies: Wait, why him?**_

_**Agent: Simple. Carrot top has funny hair. *grins***_

_**Ichigo: I do not!**_

_**Agent: Do too. **_

_**Ichigo: I do not! * brings out his Zanpukto Zangetsu* You better not say that again. **_

_**Agent: Do too. **_

_**Ichigo: *Tries to slice Agent with Zanpukto but fails.* What the...?**_

_**Agent: Missed me. **_

_**Lies: Why do I hang out with her again?**_

Agent: Same reason I hang out with you.

Ichigo: Can I go now?

Lies and Agent: No!

Ichigo: Please?

Lies: We will tell you when you can go, until then… *Lies takes out gun from pocket of air* DANCE! *Starts shooting at Ichigo's feet*

Ichigo: What the hell! You're crazy!

Lies: That's what my doctor tells me, but I don't believe him, it's not my fault if every time I leave his office it's colored in pink and purple.

Ichigo and Agent: *awkward silence*

Lies: What?

Agent: I didn't know you were that insane * Leans over to Ichigo* Do you think it's safe to hang around her?

Ichigo: Definitely not.

Agent: Thought so, Let us go.

Agent and Ichigo: *turn and flee*

Lies: Hey! *Runs after them, bullets flying crazily*

Shippo: They didn't even notice me. How sad. Am I that insignificant?

The ghosts of Lies, Agent and Ichigo: *In creepy ghostlike voice* Yeessss!

_**Everyone: *returns***_

_**Agent: You know what, I think we should invite L. He's always in the role-plays. **_

_**L: -sigh- I was just about to catch Kira. Why did you summon me?**_

_**Agent: Because I could. Plus, you're entertaining. *Evil grin***_

_**Lies: Uh…I don't like the look of that grin. Agent, stop grinning!**_

_**Agent: *pokes out tongue* Make me.**_

_**Lies: *aims gun***_

_**L: You know, I am a detective and I could put you in jail if you kill her. But I can also look the other way. *grin***_

_**Agent: You'll let her kill me? I thought we were friends.**_

_**L: We were until you summoned me.**_

_**Agent: Dude, you already caught Kira in the first role-play between Boat and I.**_

_**L: *remembers* Oh yeah. **_

_**Lies: -face palm-**_

L: Well I haven't had candy in three minutes!

Everyone: *stares*

L: *Now visibly distressed* Well it's a long time!

Everyone: *Stares*

L: Stop staring! * Sobs and runs away*

Agent: Right…

Lies: In case you've forgotten my dear, dear friend. Run, you're going to die. *Cocks gun*

Agent: NOOOO! WHY! I'm too young to die!

Ichigo: No one is too young to die.

Lies:*stares* That was deep dude.

Ichigo: Well, I'm not a bone head!

Lies: Yeah, but…

Agent: You kinda look like one.

Ichigo: You guys are so cold. *Runs off sobbing*

Lies: Why do people keep running away from us in tears?

Edward Alric suddenly appears behind them, Lies and Agent don't notice….

Ed: Because you guys are THE BOMB!

_**Agent: Wow, OOC much?**_

_**Ed: *runs* The bomb, the bomb.**_

_**Agent: Look, I know I'm awesome, but you don't need to…**_

_**Ed: *Runs past Agent* The bomb!**_

_**Lies: What bomb is he talking about?**_

_**Agent: Pfft, as if I know.**_

_***Whistling sound***_

_**Agent: How cliché. The bomb is gonna fall on us, and we're gonna die. **_

_**Lies: *Disappears***_

_**Agent: -sigh- Fine, I'm vanishing.**_

_***Bomb falls* *explodes* *Everything on fire***_

_**Agent and Lies: *Reappear***_

_**Agent: It seems the writers of this role-place are running out of funny ideas. **_

_**Lies: Yeah, Agent, we're the writers.**_

_**Agent: You think I haven't worked that out? I was pointing out that we're lazy.**_

_**Lies: -sigh- I won't argue with you. There's no point.**_

_**Agent: Yes there is.**_

_**Lies: Will you stop arguing!**_

Agent: Never!

Lies: Fine, I think I want an ice-cream. *walks over to ice-cream stand that sits in the middle of the blast zone*

Agent: *trailing after her* Uh, Lies? Don't you think it's weird that the only thing that didn't die or disintegrate in the blast was an ice-cream stand?

Lies: *turning away from ice-cream stall* No….

Agent:* Looks at the huge, terrifying, scary monster rising up from the ice-cream stand* Lies…

Lies: Shhh…. I'm trying to concentrate!

Agent: Lies…

Lies: shut up!

Agent: lies….

Lies: Oh for god sake! Shut the hell up, I'm trying to decide between chocolate or strawberry and all I can hear is you and a very ominous roaring noise!

Agent: Lies!

Lies: What?

Agent: *points*

Lies: *turns*

Lies and Agent: AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

_**The role-play will be back in a moment**_

_**Ad: **_

_**Boy: Mom, I'm hungry and there's nothing good to eat.**_

_**Mom: Try this cereal. *gives cereal***_

_**Boy: Wow, it looks so good! *Eats* It's so chocolately.**_

_**Mom: That's right, and it's only 75% sugar.**_

_**Boy: Wow, that's so healthy.**_

_**Mom: *to audience* If you're a mother like me, you've probably noticed you kids are getting fatter. But with this cereal, Chocy puffs, they'll lose weight instantly.**_

_***Song* Chocy puffs, tons of sugar, just for you.**_

_**We will now return to the role-play.**_

_**Agent: What. The hell. Was that?**_

_**Lies: Umm…an advert I think.**_

_**Agent: Ok then…**_

_**Lies: We need to add in more people.**_

_**Agent: There's a massive monster behind you right now and you want to add in more characters.**_

_**Lies: Yep, they can help us fight!**_

_**Agent: -sigh- Add away**_

Lies: See. I'm smart.

Agent: I call forth…. Light!

Lies: And I call add… Alphonse Alric!

Agent: *stares* why a tin can?

Lies: Oh, that is so mean! he isn't a tin can!

Al: You like to hurt people, don't you agent?

Agent: More then anything in the entire world.

Al: Even kitty cats?

Agent: Especially kitty cats.

Al: That is so… sad!

Lies: huh?

Al: Well, Agent is obviously sick, when does your life expire oh mental one?

Lies: *Cracks up*

Agent: Uh…

Al: No, that's alright, don't talk, save your energy.

Monster: I'm still here…

Al: Get lost, can't you see this poor person is going to die?

Monster: I'm very sorry for y our illness. *runs off*

Al: Now, why don't you lie down? I'll bring you some tea. Do you like soup? Oh, I should bring a kitten, it will make you feel better. *walks off in search of comforting things*

Lies: hmmm….

Agent: *shakes head* I'm not going to die! Am I?

Lies: *sneaky grin* I'm sorry Agent. I wasn't going to tell you, I didn't want you to worry, but… your test results came back a week ago…

_**Agent: Test results? I didn't have any tests done. What the hell did you do to me?**_

_**Lies: *Evil grin***_

_**Agent: -sigh- Whatever. Wait, where's Light?**_

_**Light: Here. *Eats potato chip dramatically. **_

_**Agent: Great! L!**_

_**L: *Comes flying out of the sky* Kkkiiiirrraaaa**_

_**Agent: You're dead Light!**_

_**Light: Not if I can help it! *Uses shield***_

_**Lies: What the heck goes on in your head?**_

_**Agent: *Sings* Sunshine, lollipops and rainbows…**_

_**Lies: Ok…**_

_**Al: *Returns* Here, I brought you a kitty. **_

_**Agent: Can I call him Train?**_

_**Al: Sure ^^**_

_**Agent: Awesome!**_

_**Train: *Transforms in to Train Heartnet* Will you stop scratching behind my ears!**_

_**Agent: Whoa, he's a person. Can I use your gun?**_

_**Train: Uhh…sure…**_

_**Agent: Awesome. *Points gun at Lies* That's for telling me I'm gonna die.**_

_**Lies: I'm sorry!**_

_**Agent: No your not.**_

Lies: *sigh* You're right, I'm not.

Agent: Ah ha! Your true colors come out at last!

Lies: Yes, yes they do. *pulls out knife* Now you're going to die now, instead of in a month.

Ichigo suddenly appearing

Ichigo: That's not a knife, *pulls out huge knife* this is a knife!

Lies: Ichigo, but out, this isn't your duel.

AL: You aren't in a dual.

Lies: Oh yeah. *pulls out glove from another pocket of air* These air pockets are so handy. *Walks over to Agent*

I challenge you, to a duel! *Slaps Agents cheek with glove*

Everyone else but Lies and Agent: Ohhh….

Agent: *Slaps Lies back* I accept!

Later, at sundown in the duel arena…

Referee: I want a clean, fair fight…

Lies: Agent, why did we pick a flower throwing duel?

Agent: Flowers are awesome!

Al: Yeah!

L: This is, not right.

Light: I agree. The concept of throwing flowers at each other in a fight to the death is ludicrous.

Ed: Kill each other already!

_**Agent: Make us!**_

_**Lies: Take this! *Throws daisy***_

_**Agent: Is that it? *Throws pansy***_

_**Lies: Lame *Throws lilly***_

_**L: This is pointless**_

_**Agent: -sigh- I'm bored *walks off***_

_**Lies: I win!**_

_**Light: No you didn't. The winner was the one who survived. **_

_**Al: That means you both win!**_

_**Agent: Yay, trophy time!**_

_**L: Let us eat cake!**_

_**Agent: Yes! Cake. What type of cake?**_

_**L: Strawberry!**_

_**Agent: *grin***_

_**Lies: Does she realise that your behind her, L?**_

_**L: I don't think so…**_

_**Al: Agent!**_

_**Agent: YES?**_

_**Al: *Throws ball* Go fetch the ball. **_

_**Agent: *Pulls Al's head off* I'm not a dog!**_

_**Train: Meow.**_

_**Everyone: *Weird look at Train***_

_**Train: Ahem…Sorry, habit.**_

Lies: I have the habit of falling down.

Agent: I have the habit of randomly laughing for no reason.

Ed: I have the habit of running away from milk.

Al: I have the habit of… Kitty Cat! *runs off*

L: I have the habit of… sweets! *runs off*

Light: I have the habit of killing people.

Awkward silence…

Light: And you are all next! *pulls out death note*

Ryuk: Nobody summoned me… don't you care about poor Ryuk?

Everyone, who hadn't run off for sweets and cats: No!

Ryuk: You're all evil!

Lies: I love yellow.

Light: Yellow?

Lies: Yep, it's so… yellowy.

Agent: Right….

Lies: *grin*

Three hours later…

Lies: I can't believe we are all so boring that we couldn't think of one thing to talk about in three whole hours!

_**Agent: I can believe it. I mean, look at us, we're pretty boring people.**_

_**L: I'm not boring. **_

_**Agent: True. You are pretty entertaining. Especially when I push you over. Moo-hahaha.**_

_**Lies: Moo?**_

_**Agent: *continues to laugh***_

_**Light: So… been to any strip clubs lately?**_

_**Agent and Lies: o_O**_

_**Light: What?**_

_**Agent: Moron.**_

_**Ryuk: Can I have an apple now?**_

_**Light: No**_

_**Ryuk: Please?**_

_**Agent: Of course you can ^^ *Gives Ryuk bag of apples***_

Light: Oh why? Why did you do that? Now he'll only go to you for apples and I'll… be left alone… *grins* oh my god! Thankyou, thankyou, thankyou! *bows at agents feet as Ryuk asks Agent for more apples*

Lies: *In sing song voice* Let us all skip in the rain, for it is so much fun! *screams* AHHHHH! Acid rain! *runs around in circles*

Thirty minutes later…

Under an umbrella…

With pink and purple polka dots…

Someone fainted…

Who fainted?

Let's find out…

Under the umbrella…

Lies: Ahhh Agent fainted!

Ed: WHO ARE YOU CALLING SO SMALL HE COULD LIVE IN AN ANTS BELLY COMFORTABLY AND EAT PANCAKES AND DANCE AND SING AND DRINK FROM RAINDROPS!

Lies: No one said anything like that Ed.

Ed: well, you could have.

Al: KITTY!

Light: I sing a song of six pence…

L: You are Kira!

Light: Not again…

Ichigo: I like Rukia.

Rukia: What is this human emotion? Love, Hate, oh…. It's pudding.

Train: I like pudding.

Lies: Agent, Agent are you okay?

Agent: *telepathically* this is so lame. Even while unconscious I'm bored.

Lies: Well, it's you're fault!

Agent: Says who?

Everyone: Says me!

_**Agent: *Revives* Ugh, I'm so bored!**_

_**Lies: We know, you already told us.**_

_**Agent: Hmm, I want to climb a mountain! In a scuba divers outfit**_

_**Lies: *Opens portal* Ok, come everyone. Out!**_

_**L: What? As if!**_

_**Agent: As if you'd say as if!**_

_**L: *Pokes tongue out***_

_**Agent: *Throws lollipop* Fetch!**_

_**Ryuk: Can I have an apple?**_

_**Lies: You're going to get fat eating all those apples.**_

_**Agent: *Shines light on Light* Burn!**_

_**Light: Nnnnoooooooo!**_

_**Train: Yeah, I'm gonna go. See ya.**_

_**Agent: *Waves* Byeee!**_

_**Everyone else: *Leaves***_

_**Agent: Oi, carrot top!**_

_**Ichigo: What?**_

_**Agent: Lol, you responded!**_

_**Rukia: Carrot top!**_

_**Lies: Will you stop causing so much pain?**_

_**Agent: Pfft, no. It's the most fun I've had in years.**_

_**Lies: -face palm-**_

_**Agent: *Yawns* Anyway, I think I'm gonna wrap this up. My brain is dead.**_

_**Lies: Mine's not!**_

_**Agent: *rolls eyes***_

_**Lies: In fact, you know what! **_

_**Agent: What?**_

_**Lies: Look behind you!**_

_**Agent: What? Why? Crap. We're dead!**_

* * *

AN: Hi! You have just experienced the inner workings of my friend Agent, and I's minds.

I hope you all appreciate it for it took over a day to make.

Yeah, I know, a day is not that long. But I don't care, review or I will eat you. Actually I'll make agent eat you, I'm not a cannibal. Oh crap, I just realised I'm sleeping over at a cannibals house. Are her other family members cannibals too? Was this entire friendship just an elaborate ruse to get me over to her house so they could eat me? Are we really having roast Lies instead of roast chicken tonight? *starts hyperventilating*

Agent: Lies?

Lies: AHHH! *runs away*

_**A/N: Hey there! Nice to know that that's what you think of me Lies. *Glare* Anyway, for you know I might just be a cannibal. And maybe we will eat you tonight. Hahaha. -sigh- I really don't know what to say. Thank you for reading this role play. We hope you enjoyed it. Please review. Especially if you thought it was weird, of funny. And… we really don't mind receiving flames. ^^ Expect another role play eventually. Bye**_


	2. Round 2

**Agent and Lies roleplay ****extravaganza round 2**

AN: Hi! Lies and Agent here, back for round two of our awesome roleplay! Hope you enjoy it! – Lies

_**Disclaimer: We do not own anything that has anything to do with the characters in this roleplay.**_

Key: Lies - normal

_**Agent - bold italic  
**_

* * *

Lies: TOMATO SOUP!

Everyone: *Scream*

Agent: Run for your lives!

Everyone: *Runs off as tidal wave of red tomato-y liquid rises above them*

Lies: We're all gonna die!

Noba: *Creates protal to another dimension.*

Darkness descends.

Agent: I think we're dead.

Ichigo: *Scoff* Idiot, course we're not.

Agent: Well how would you know?

Ichigo: Well obviously I'm smarter than you.

Agent: *Glowers*

Lies: Okay… Everyone, cool off, we're going to ha- *Squeal*

Everyone: Ahh!

Everyone: What?

Lies: Something touched me.

_**Creepy pervert guy: Sorry, that was me.**_

_**Lies: Agent, why did you write him in?**_

_**Agent: I figured this roleplay could use some fun.**_

_**Lies: *Kills creepy pervert guy* No more fun!**_

_**Agent: Aww…**_

_**Lies: We need to run away from the tomato juice!**_

_**Agent: Wonder twins! Form of a boat!**_

_**Everyone: -Stare-**_

_**Agent: What?**_

_**Lies: Moving on…**_

_**Another random person: I will help thee cross the river if ye help me solve a puzzle.**_

_**Agent: -Sigh- What is it?**_

_**Another random person: 3 things must cross. A Lies, an Agent and a sheep. I person maximum in the boat with me at all times. If a Lies is left with an Agent the Agent will eat lies.**_

_**Agent: Wait, what?**_

_**Another random person: Don't interrupt me. If a sheep is left with an Agent will eat the sheep.**_

_**Agent: *Rolls eyes***_

_**Another random person: What order should I take them across?**_

_**Lies: Take Agent, comeback, take the sheep, take agent back, take Lies, comeback, and then take Agent!**_

_**Another random person: Correct!**_

_**Everyone: Yay!**_

Lies: Why the complication? As we sit here solving riddles, the tomato juice comes even closer!

Another random person: I wanted to see how long I could make you forget about the soup as I am not really another random person, I am… An evil Villan! Mwahahahaha!

Everyone: *Scream!*

Agent: Run away from the evil villain!

_**Ichigo: Yes, everyone run away like little girls!**_

_**Agent: I know! Go go gaget water vacuum! *Sucks up liquid.***_

_**Evil villain: Aww…**_

_**Agent: Take that!**_

_**L: Why am I here?**_

_**Agent: I don't know, I didn't summon you this time.**_

_**Lies: And I don't know how to summon.**_

_**L: -Sigh- Since I'm here, I guess I should solve that case.**_

_**Everyone: What case?**_

_**L: I've been informed that there is a conspiracy going on at Burwood East Primary School! Apparently that have been brainwashing the students into following a cult. And the principle is the leader!**_

_**Agent: Oh yeah, I remember that!**_

_**Lies: Yeah, we were gonna solve it but we got lazy.**_

_**L: How long have you known about this?**_

_**Agent: A few months now.**_

L: *Lollipop appears in hand* 99.8%.

Everyone: *Looks confused* What?

L: There is a 99.8% chance that Agent and/or Lies is the real leader of the conspiracy.

Lies: Hey! That's unfair! You jerk! *Runs forward and yanks L's lollipop away from him. *You don't deserve this!

L: 99.9%

Agent and Lies: *Growling menacingly*

Al: *Slides in* Okay, as cosy as this tense, murderous atmosphere is… BREAK IT UP!

Everyone: *Screams*

Lies: *Whispers in Agent's ear* Al is scary…

Al: Brother, I'm not scary, am I?

Ed: *From his hiding place behind Noba* Please Al, you're kindness in a can. Except for now. Now you are scary. Please stop emitting that strange, creepy red and black aura.

Al: I'm sorry Ed! *Runs off*

Agent: I an not the leader of that school conspiracy.

Lies: *Kicks Agent* Idiot! He's forgotten!

L: *In creepy voice while staring into space* I never forget anything…

Agent and Lies: Creepy…

Ed: To my sweetheart…

Everyone: What are you reading?

Ed: A letter Al composed to Winry.

Al: *Appears suddenly* What!

_**Ed: Uh oh! *Runs***_

_**Agent: Umm, you're about to run into a wall.**_

_**Ed: *Transmutes***_

_**Lies: Nevermind.**_

_**L: *Starts handcuffing Agent***_

_**Agent: What the hell?**_

_**L: I don't like your clothes, so I'm locking you up.**_

_**Lies: Hmm, he's not L. *Pulls off L mask* Oh my god!**_

_**Agent: Light! Why won't you stay dead?**_

_**Light: I'm a vampire! I sparkle in the light!**_

_**Agent: Stupid vampire! KILL!**_

_**Light: Uhh…**_

_**Misa: Run light!**_

_**Light: *Runs***_

_**Misa: *Follows***_

_**Agent: Aww… Hey, what's this black mist?**_

_**Lies: I don't know.**_

_**Agent: I can't breathe! *Faints***_

_**Lies: Same. *Faints***_

_**Hours later**_

_**Agent: *Wakes up* Where are we?**_

_**Villain: It is I, the real villain!**_

_**Lies: Great…**_

_**L:…Are you the principle?**_

_**Villain: *Nods***_

_**L: …I see… and who is that? *Points to black swirling mass.**_

_**Villain: It's my wife.**_

_**Agent: Lol, do you have any kids?**_

_**Villian: Of course.**_

_**Agent: *Blinks* You did it with a swirling mass? How did she manage to have kids?**_

_**Villain: Ugh… Will you just shut up?**_

_**Agent: No!**_

_**Villain: *Tranquilises Agent***_

_**Lies: Agent! What did you do to her?**_

_**L: Lies, fight back! He's really just Sven in disguise**_

Lies: *Gasps in horror* That great lump of creepiness?  
L: *Nods sagely*

Lies: Eww *Kicks out at Sven disguised as villain-dude* Take that, and that, and this!

Sven: Ahh, help me my wife!

Black swirling mann: No!

Everyone: *Freezes* You can talk?

Sven: She speaks!

Black Swirling Mass: Of course I can you idiot, I just didn't feel like it before. Who would want to talk to you? *smiles (somehow)* Now I have the company of all these lovely, awesome people!

Everyone: Aww! Thanks Black Swirling Cloud Mass!

Black Swirling Mass: No problem! Now, Let's all go to my house for tea and cupcakes. Sven, you are not invited.

Sven: Ahh! No fair!

Everyone: *Laugh*

Lies: *Sticks out tongue* Hah hah!

Random appearing cactus with top hat and cane: Can I come along?

Lies: Sure, everyone's invited! Except Sven!

Sven: *Face falls, Pouts*

Cactus: Yay!

At the house

_**Agent and Cactus: *Dancing***_

_**Lies: *Drinks punch***_

_**L and Mass: *Discussing politics***_

_**Sven: *Crashes through wall* Everyone freeze!**_

_**Everyone: *Blink* **_

_**Agent: That dress makes you look fat.**_

_**Sven: It does? *cries and runs away***_

_**Lies: Okay… anyway, Miss Mass, thanks for the party, but we must be on our way.**_

_**Mass: Okay, farewell!**_

_**Everyone: Bye!**_

_**Lies: (musical notes) We're off to solve the riddle, the riddle at Burwood East School! (musical notes)**_

_**Agent: Must you sing?**_

_**Lies: Yep**_

Agent: Meany!

Lies: Yep.

Agent: Nope.

Lies: Yep.

Agent: Nope.

Lies: *opens mouth to say yep but gets cut off*

L: there is no point to this conversation. I order you to stop.

Lies and Agent: You have no authority over us!

L: Yes I do.

Lies and Agent: Don't!

L: Do!

Lies and Agent: Don't!

L: Do!

Lies: Don't! Now shut up I want to sing! Tra la la la la la!

Ed: Shut her up!

Lies: (Musical notes) Ed is a smally boy, smally boy, smally boy! (musical notes)

Ed: Who are you calling so small he must not exist anymore?

Lies: that cactus! Didn't I tell you that his name is Ed?

Everyone" *Dumbfounded expressions* Right!

Lies: Yep.

Agent: No more yeps!

Lies: Well I'm bored!

Agent: Then go pat that giant turtle.

Lies: Giant turtle?

Agent: Yeah, that one over there. *Points to distance*

Giant turtle: Everyone thought it was the tortoise and the hare that raced in that story… But it was really a turtle. *Cicadas singing*

Agent: … What is going on?

Lies: *Presses self destruct button*

Agent: What the hell?

Everything: *Blows up*

Lies: Moohahaha!

Agent: I guess we gotta go bring back the world…

* * *

AN: I can't believe we just blew up the WORLD!

Agent: I know, maybe we should have stopped and thought it through!

Agent and Lies: Nah! *Grin*

Lies: So, we hope you liked it, we had fun writing it, especially as we did so during all out classes today, resulting in fun-ness. Yeah okay, I be rambling so I'll hand you all over to my friend, Agent. Agent, you're on!

_**Agent: I. Am. On. Fire! *Cheers* Anyway, just like Lies said, we hope you had fun reading this chapter. Whoa, I'm so tired. Umm… I don't know what else to say… Please review as we would love to hear what you think! **_


	3. Round 3

**Agent and Lies roleplay extravaganza round 3**

An: Lies: HIII! I told you we'd be back! I don't lie! *Pokes out tongue* I hope you all missed us because we missed you! Ahh our lovely tomodachi! We love you all…

Agent: Lies… Lies… stop being mushy, lovey dovey is not a good emotion to have… *sigh* I give up.

Lies: Hi and welcome to Round Three of Agent and Lies Role play Extravaganza! We ask that you keep your hands and feet in the story at all times and keep your seatbelts fastened. (Agent and Lies accept no responsibility if injury or death occur while reading this marvelous work of fiction) We hope you enjoy!

_**A/N: Yeah, what she said…**_

_**Disclaimer: We ownth nothing!**_

Key: Lies = Normal

_**Agent = Italics and bold**_

* * *

Somewhere in a dark, dank abyss…

Lies: Hello…?

…

…

… Hello…?

…

…

Is anybody out there…?

Agent: No.

Lies: AHHHH! Agent don't do that you scared the soul out of me!

Agent: you don't have a soul Lies; you're a soulless human being.

Lies: Ahh, I've missed your biting words and cutting jibes. Where were you all this time?

Agent: I was trying to use this fantastic opportunity to get away from you but it didn't work. I found out the only way out of this dastardly fix is by using the power of both our minds at once and thinking up a way to get out. It is a mission no one can accomplish on their own…

Lies: Wow… Look Agent, while you were rambling I found a doorway! Do you think it leads to a way out?

Agent: Impossible! I just told you, no one is smart enough to get out on their own!

Lies: How can that be true? I just found the way out…

Agent: It mustn't be the way out; you're not smart enough to find the way out all on your own… it must be a doorway to ice-cream land or something, definitely not to the outside world however.

Lies: I'm going to open it and see where it goes.

Agent: I told you, it won't do any good…

Lies: *pokes out tongue at Agent* I'm going to try anyway!*Skips over and opens the door*

_**Agent: Told you it led to nowhere. It's just candy land.**_

_**Lies: *Eyes widen in delight* CANDY LAND! *Runs through the door way.***_

_**L: *Comes up behind Agent* You really should have restrained her.**_

_**Agent: -sigh- Al, could you restrai…n... Aww, come on. As if you're running around Candy Land too.**_

_**Ed: Did any of you notice that there's thousands of doors floating around?**_

_**Agent: *Looks around* Hey, you're right. *Goes and fetches Lies* We're going exploring! *Drags Lies behind her***_

_**Lies: Candy Land! *Cries**Sits in a corner with mushrooms sprouting around her***_

_**Ichigo: *Randomly appears* Let's go through this door. *Points to door that looks like a massive cat flap***_

_**Agent: Uh… Okay then. *Goes through door.***_

_**L: It appears to be some sort of feline palace.**_

_**Ed: Oh no.**_

_**Al: *Bowls everyone over.* KITTY!**_

_**Agent: *Hits Ichigo up-side the head.***_

_**Ichigo: What the heck was that for?**_

_**Agent: Every carrot top has the privilege of receiving one free hit a day.**_

Ichigo: STOP CALLING ME CARROT TOP!

Agent: Why would I want to do that? It is so much fun making a joke out of the color of your hair.

Ichigo: It's good manners is all…

Lies: Everyone should use their manners; it's the meaning of life.

L: Actually the meaning of life is to catch Kira.

Light: no, it's really not. The meaning of life is TO KILL ALL THE BAD PEOPLE AND BECOME GOD!

L: Ah Ha! I knew you would slip up some time! My percentage of your expectancy of being Kira has just been elevated to 100%!

Light: No, I was just saying what Kira would have said if he was here, it is always good to get into the mind set of the criminal you are trying to catch. So really the percentage of expectancy that I am Kira should have gone down 24% not up.

Agent: Anyway… can I go play with the kitties now?

Lies: I don't see why not.

Agent and AL: YAYYYYYYYYYY!

L: That was a lot of Y's for such a short word…

Ed: Hang on, if this is Kitty Palace, doesn't that mean that the substance kitties drink will also be through this doorway.

L: There is a 99% chance that that is possible.

Ed: *Waves arms frantically* NOOOO! Don't make me go in there! Milk! Milk! It burns, it BURNS!

Lies: Stop overreacting Edward. It won't kill you. And maybe if you drank it you'd grow a little.

Ed: Who are you calling so small he could be mistaken for a sprinkle in a batch of brownies!

Lies: Ahhh… that would be you?

Ed: *Growls* *Pounces* I will get you for this Lies! And all your puny friends too!

_**Agent: Lol, the word puny looks funny.**_

_**Al: Hey, you're right.**_

_**Lies: Agent, I thought we were going to go exploring.**_

_**Agent: *Ignores Lies and continues to **__**cuddle a kitty.***_

_**Lies: Agent!**_

_**Agent: What? *Drops kitty* **_

_**Kitty: *Runs away***_

_**Agent: No! Kitty! –sigh- Anyway, let's get going. There is nothing more to see in this place. **_

_**Mysterious shadow: Muhahaha**_

_**L: What was that?**_

_**Mysterious shadow: Twas me, Shakespeare's zombie!**_

_**Agent: You've got to be kidding me.**_

_**Lies: Romeo, Romeo, where for art thou Romeo.**_

_**Shakespeare's zombie: Wrong Shakespeare.**_

_**Agent: *Randomly pulls out weapon.* Attack the zombie!**_

_**Everyone: *Attacks with tomato juice* **_

_**Shakespeare's zombie: Wait, I come bringing potato chips!**_

_**Lies: Yum!**_

_**Al: Do you wanna be friends?**_

_**Shakespeare's zombie: *Evil grin* Sure.**_

_**Al: Awesome!**_

_**Agent: Anyway, let's have a picnic before we go exploring any more!**_

_**Lies: Okay ^^**_

_**Agent: *Gets out picnic set***_

_**L: *Attacks the tea* You do have earl grey don't you?**_

_**Al: Here brother, have some milk. **_

_**Agent: Eat tuna fish sandwich carrot top! *Shoves sandwich in Ichigo's mouth*Ugh, I'm bored. Let's sing a song of sixpence!**_

_**Lies: Pocket full of rye!**_

_**Random person: *Walks by***_

_**Agent: Why can't I be funny *cries* my funny bone is missing…I'm broked**_

_**Ichigo: *With a mouth full of sandwich* That's funny; I thought we killed everyone when we blew up the world.**_

_**Agent: That ain't no person, that's… An evil turnip, ready to battle us in an epic battle of wits and bravery!**_

_**Everyone: Ahhhh!**_

_**Agent: Follow me everyone, we must attack and become victorious! Let! Us! Fight!**_

_**Everyone: Charge!**_

_**Turnip: *Dodges* You cannot stop me, for I am the master of invention and dissection! Twas a night so long ago when I, The turnip of invention and dissection, built the invention that put me on the map. The SOUL EATER! One of the greatest inventions in the world. And now I finally get to test it out on you. *Evil grin***_

_**L: You invented that? SO you were the one who stole my secret invention designs. How did you acquire them?**_

_**Turnip: Oh, someone you know quite well. Light?**_

_**Light: *Appears* It was I, L. I was the one who took your plans to make sure you didn't get any glory for it! Because I'm just that evil!**_

_**L: I knew you were Kira! I must stop you. You and Agent must have a dance off. If you lose, I will catch you! **_

_**Agent and Light: What?**_

_**Agent: I'm not going to dance!**_

_**L: I will make you then. *Gets out gun and starts to shoot at Agent's feet.***_

Light: AHHH Why is L being so mean? *pouts*

L: I'm not being mean, I'm being practical. If I do not shoot you, you will not dance. I am not stupid.

Light: But shooting people is mean!

L: Only because you say it is.

Everyone: We say it is too.

L: Ahhh! You're all against me! It is a conspiracy!

Lies: Aren't we forgetting something?

Agent: I don't know… are we?

Turnip: Hmm..*Ponders* Oh I remember! You forgot… ME! Now, I shall attack!

Lies: NOOOOO *Throws randomly appearing pillow!*

Turnip: NOOOOOO How did you guess my secret weakness?

Agent: She is totally superbly awesome and also… a NINJA!

Lies: *cheers*

Ichigo: *mumbles around awesome tasting sandwich* Woooh! Go Lies!

L: Why has everyone forgotten that I am still shooting at Agents feet?

Everyone: Because we all think you being here is pointless!

L: *eyes tearing up* That cuts me deep. I don't think I can go on…

Ryuk: You'll never be pointless to me L! You shall always be the one who tries to kill the evil Light who does not bring me enough APPLES! For that, you shall always be my friend!

L: That makes me so happy! *Hugs Ryuk while crying for joy*

Ryuk and L: *sobbing hopelessly* We shall always be friends!

Turnip: Well, isn't that just a touching scene? However… *ominous music* It shall not save you from a great deal of pain and misfortune! ATTACK MY BEAUTIES!

Soul Eater Bees: We shall attack… ATTACK! *Zoom*

Everyone: AHHHH! Run away run away!

Soul Eater Bees: You shall never escape from us! We are EVERYWHERE!

Lies: That is really creepy… what are you? A bad imitation of evil spirits? Have you been stalking us? OMG! Have you been spying on the girls changing rooms in the other galaxy again! *Suddenly sounds like a respectable educator* How could you Soul Eater Bees? I thought we had gone through this! Perverseness is not allowed in the Academy of misfortune and death! If I hear of another incident like this you shall all be expelled!

Soul Eater Bees: *Looking ashamed of themselves* We're sorry Headmistress Lies. It won't happen again.

Agent: Since when have you been a headmistress?

Lies: Since I completed my education at Headmistress school. It's in the Galaxy of education. It's quite highly thought of. I actually can't believe you've never heard of it before…

L: It's because she's so slow. It takes her a couple of years for the most simple minded of things to sink into her sludge of a mind…

Agent: *sitting in a corner growing mushrooms* That hurt, it really did.

Ichigo: Stop being such a baby.

Agent: *suddenly very angry* Hey! You can't talk! You've just been sitting there stuffing your face with sandwiches! It's not like your feelings are being hurt!

Ichigo: *Matter of factly* That's because I'm awesome and everybody loves me. There's no reason for my feelings to be hurt.

Lies: he's so pigheaded, I bet he has difficulty walking through doors his ego is so big…

_**Agent: Ya'know what, carrot top? You have no reason to be so up yourself. After all, your big ego is only a sign of over compensation.**_

_**Ichigo: *Embarrassed* I'm not over compensating!**_

_**Agent: You're sword is pretty big too. Maybe that's a sign as well. *Evil grin***_

_**Ichigo: *Cries* I'm not over compensating. *Runs away***_

_**Lies: Hey, what happened to the Soul Eater Bees? All I can see is a bunch of trees.**_

_**Trees: *Turn back into bees* We are Transforming Soul Eater Bees!**_

_**Everyone: Oh no!**_

_**Turnip: You will all die now!**_

_**Agent: Not if I can help it! *Attacks Turnip with a round-house kick* Take that! Hahaha, bet you didn't see that coming. **_

_**Turnip: *Blood spurts* *Dies***_

_**Soul Eater Bees: *Fall to the ground dramatically***_

_**Agent: See that everyone? I'm awesome!**_

_**Lies: Now who has the big ego?**_

_**Agent: Hey, I deserve it!**_

_**Ed: Yeah, yeah.**_

_**Agent: Anyway, I think that it's time to go through another door. This place is starting to get on my nerves, and I really don't want to fight anything else. That kick took up some of my energy.**_

_**Everyone: *Leaves through the Kitty Palace door way***_

_**Al: Let's go though the purple door next!**_

_**Lies: Okay. Wait, what happened to Ichigo? Did we leave him in Kitty Palace?  
Agent: Nah, he ran off ages ago. Who knows where he is now. Let's just forget about him ^^**_

_**Ichigo:*Walks over to everyone* I'm still here you know.**_

_**Agent: Who cares?**_

_**L: Hmm, this purple door appears to read Fanfiction Farm in Latin. Shall we enter? **_

_**Ed: Let's.**_

_**Agent: Dahhh dah dahhh! Onwards to Fanfiction Farm. Where people quote fan fiction and cosplay as OC's. Tis a bustling farm full of wonder and fun. Let us all bask in its brilliance. *Opens door***_

_**Everyone: *Is blinded by a bright light* What the…?**_

_**Al: Is there any kitties here? **_

_**Agent: Hmm, give me a sec. *writes a fan fic about a kitty and then puts it on the ground.***_

_**Kitty: *Appears***_

_**Al: *Runs off to chase the kitty* KITTY!**_

_**Agent: Again? Just make sure you don't get lost. I don't want you to go missing, unlike some people that would be better off gone *Glares at Ichigo.***_

_**Anime characters with OOC personalities: *Surround everyone.* Ring-a-ring a rosie.**_

_**Lies: Creepy…**_

_**Anime characters with OOC personalities: A pocketful of posies…**_

_**Agent: Maybe coming here wasn't a very good idea… Hmm, how about we leave?**_

_**Ed: But first we need to find Al.**_

_**Agent: Oh yeah. Well he went over to those mountains over there *points* **_

_**L: Those aren't mountains… their piles for sugar!**_

_**Ichigo: No their not. You just wish they were. **_

_**Agent: Come on. Let's go! *Runs off in the direction of the mountain/sugar pile things.**_

_**Lies: Wait up Agent!**_

_**At the mountain things.**_

_**Ed: I can't see Al anywhere. **_

_**Al: I'm up here brother! Save me!**_

_**Everyone: *Looks up to see Al in a hot air balloon.***_

_**L: How did you get up there?**_

_**Al: I was kidnapped! Now I can't escape.**_

_**Agent: Oh My God, why does this keep happening? Why do I always write scenes like this. It's insane.**_

_**Ichigo: Geez Agent, chill will you?**_

Agent: NO! I will not _Chill_ Jeez, who do you think you are? Telling me what to do all the time! Gosh…

Ichigo: *Grovelling* No I'm sorry Agent I didn't mean it!

Agent: *turns back on Ichigo* I don't care.

Lies: Come on guys, we have to save Al!

Everyone: *skips merrily towards hot air balloon*

Al: *flails arms melodramatically* HELP HELP HELP! I'm DYING!

Lies: Calm down, you're not dying!

L: There is a 9.376% chance that Al will die.

Ichigo: Zengetsu! Help us rescue Alphonse Elric!

Zengetsu: No

Everyone: *screeching to a dramatic halt* WHAT!

Zengetsu: What's in it for me?

Ichigo: Fame and glory?

Zengetsu: Alright!

Ichigo: Bankai! *Shwoosh*

*awesome sound effects*

Ichigo: We shall save you Al!

Zengetsu: Who are you calling we? Without me, you'd be nothing!

Ichigo: Not true, I am awesomeness itself; you are just my puny sidekick!

Zengetsu: Why you insolent human being! You're not even a real soul reaper, you're just a substitute!

Ichigo: Why I oughta!

Lies: *blows whistle* Alright, break it up, it's time you boys cooled down, Al is still floating in the air away from us you know, if we continue to run like this I'm going to die of hyperventilation… I'm not exactly a fit person you know…

Agent: it's true; I've seen how far she can run without collapsing. It's shameful.

Lies: Hey, you don't have to agree with me you know!

Agent: True, But then I'd be lying.

Lies: *Sigh* You and your morals…

Al: Have you forgotten about me! I'm still being kidnapped you know!

Lies: NO WAY! I had totally forgotten. We shall rescue you immediately!

Ichigo: I'd rather just eat these awesome sandwiches. *Points to randomly appearing sandwiches that he is stuffing his face with*

L: NOOOO! Ichigo those are poison apples in disguise!

Wicked witch: Mwahhahahahaha! *Cackles hideously* You fell for my trick and now you shall die!

L: No! He will not because I have cast a spell that means anything that happens to him will actually happen to you!

Lies: You're not a magic person though L.

L: *whispering stealthily* Shhh… She doesn't know that though…

Agent: *Looking at ominously growing in power witch* I think she knows now though…

L: *staring wide eyed up at witch* Oh fish sticks on a silver platter

Everyone: *stares at L* …

L: …

Everyone: …

L:… What…?

Everyone: *shakes head in unison* I can't believe you are a genius/master mind awesome sleuth…

L: *sing song voice* That's why you love me!

Everyone: *face palm*

Al: AHHHHHHHHHH! My captor has just shown his face! He is.. He is… A LIZARD!

L: No, that's no lizard, top be exact, that is the Godzilius Alilious… or, as it is more commonly know as… GODZILLA! I now predict that there is a 59.92% chance we will all die a horrible, horrible death…

Agent: WOOAH…

Lies: Yeah, what she said…

Al: Waaahhh Help me!

Godzilla: ROAR!

Al: AHHH

Godzilla: Roar

Al: AHHH

Godzilla: ROA…

Everyone: OKAY WE GET IT!

Godzilla: *clears throat* Alphonse Elric. It has come to my attention that you are a soul attached to a suit of armor. I have also found out in my explorations of this world that armor isn't very nice to consume. Therefore I shall be letting you go.

Al: YAY!

Godzilla: But! I demand a price for the safe return of your body.

Al: Okayyy… What do you want?

Godzilla: I want… those sandwiches… *Points to previously mentioned poisonous apples in the disguise of sandwiches, sandwiches…*

Al: Okayy…

Godzilla: YAY! Sandwiches! My favourite! Now, I shall take my leave. *random cloud appears, lifts Al from hot air balloon and carries him down to his friends*

Al: Yay! I'm HOME!

Everyone: Actually Al, you're just in the middle of Fanfiction Farm… so… no, you are not home.

Al: Ohh… Oh well! Brother is here! *Looks around for brother* Err… where is he?

Everyone: * Looks around* Err… good question… where is he?

Al: Brother? Brother why did you leave me?

Ed: I haven't left you… I'm right behind you!

Al: *Spins in a circle* Oh there you are brother! *laughs* I didn't see you there!

Ed: Who are you calling so small not even the aliens from outer space can see him?

_**Agent: Since when did aliens come into this?**_

_**Godzilla: I'm off then. Thanks for the sandwiches. Bye.**_

_**Everyone: *Waves***_

_**Lies: Okay, I think we've had enough exploring for one day. Who wants to go home?**_

_**Everyone: …**_

_**Lies: Okay, who wants to go to Candy Land one last time?**_

_**Everyone: *Raises hand***_

_**Lies: Okay then, let's go!**_

_**Everyone: *Leaves through the doorway and into the abyss.***_

_**Agent: Hmm, now let's see here. Eeeni, meeni, myni, moe! *Points to random door***_

_**L: Do you think it's wise to just walk through a doorway when you don't even know where it leads to? Especially after the last two times.**_

_**Ichigo: We managed to get through those experiences. What harm will one more do?**_

_**Ed: Come on. Open the door already.**_

_**Agent: *Opens door* It's, home.**_

_**Robot: *Walks by.***_

_**Al: Was…was that a robot?**_

_**Agent: Geez, looks like we have to deal with this now…**_

_**Lies: Everyone ready? Let's go fight some robots!**_

* * *

_**A/N: Hmm, I think I failed this time round. I just couldn't really be funny. I don't know what's happening to me…*cries*. However, Lies, you're brilliant!*Hugs* Anyway, hope you liked this chapter. The next one will be better and longer because it will be our last. Please review and tell us if it sucked or not.**_

An: Aww Agent, you're funny, I laughed many times while reading this! Stop putting yourself down!

Anywho, I hope everyone liked this! I thought it was pretty awesome! Everybody should review and tell us what you thought! Now, we're off to watch some more Soul Eater! And eat jelly, jelly is yummy… *drools* If only we owned some… Maybe we could ninja it from someones house… *contemplates theft…*

Anyway… BYE! Review!


End file.
